Tuesday, August 2, 2011

It's True, I Judge

My name is, PluralofMe, and I am judgmental. I'm picky, I'm curious, I'll tear someone apart to find their faults that will ease the blow of rejection later on down the road. There, I said it. I have been honest with you, which means now you know about me and I can continue on my rants.

I most recently turned 32 years old. The realization for me is I am now only 8 years away from 40! More importantly, however, I'm only 6 years away from my official scary age, 38. Why is this my scary age, you may ask. Well, when I was 25, I met someone whom I thought had it all, except for a relationship and every time I saw her, she cried. She was devastated to be 38 and single. Now, if I am still single at 38 and this blog has reached historical heights, then I am totally fine with that. However, if I have reached 38, I am still single and I am sad...well, that frightens the hell out of me. So I have made a promise to myself, I'm not going to settle. I'm not going to bust my ass to be in a relationship with just anyone because I can't imagine anything worse than being in a relationship and unhappy. I am so happy now, I'm enjoying my life, having a blast on bad dates and good, meeting men worthy of a conversation and some a bit more and others even less. Most importantly, I have surrounded myself with people who support my indiscretions and my dry sense of sarcasm. So...therefore I will continue to scrutinize, pick apart, judge and make fun of the men that come into and out of my life, for they are truly life's unintentional humor for so many of us.

As of late, my dating life has taken a bit of a hiatus. I was so excited about meeting up with a guy a few weeks ago who I was having a great dialogue with via text messages and the phone, and who I thought was so cute on his eharmony.com profile. He gave me fodder to walk away before meeting him when in a text a few hours before we met he informed me he had a goatee (which was growing in multicolored) and that he was really into the band Vertical Horizon. Goatees aren't bad, but I have just never been particularly attracted to men who have them. I prefer go all in or go without. This attempt to grow hair in a certain formation on your face, but keeping your cheeks free of facial fur just doesn't work for me personally. And Vertical Horizon people? Well, I was just waiting for him to tell me that he followed Nickelback too. But, I enjoyed our exchanges so much that I put it aside, well, let's be honest, I put it in my back pocket for later usage. We had a nice time, not off the charts, but it was good. Then I got a text every girl dreams of the following evening which read:
"I just want to be honest. I didn't feel a romantic connection". OUCH! Whatever, he had a goatee and liked cheesy bands. Over it.

I left town for a while, work trips and family vacations to follow. So I paused the online dating site from new match ups and just dealt with what was already there. I started texting with a guy who seemed pretty funny. He started throwing out "my girl" "baby" "sweetheart" fairly soon, considering we haven't met in person. But, I thought he was kidding. Then he threw in the ringer via text this past friday night which read:
"I've been living on credit for the past 2 years."
Seriously? What the hell? Yes, I judge. He's a 37 year old man who is choosing to live on credit. He has passion for a case he has been working on, good for him, but I just can't bring myself to find this to be okay. It is people like this that are affecting my taxes. Right? I then realized, like a lightening bolt, his "baby" "my girl" and "sweetheart's" were not a joke, he's from Southern Louisiana. He is the same guy, in a different body, that I went out with in October that sweet-talked his way into my liquor cabinet and my wallet.

I have another letter in to eharmony, "Dearest Matchers of Eharmony.com, WTF? Do I want someone to make me laugh? Yes. Do I want someone to be rich? No. Do I want someone to be financially responsible? Um, absolutely. There is a difference. Figure it out. Signed, Over It."

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