My on again off again relationship with eHarmony.com

Okay, you may be thinking it is ridiculous to say I have any type of relationship at all with a website, but I do.  We've been on and off for 3 years, I believe that is considered overtime on a dating website, but I could be considered to be an over achiever.

I gave match.com a try, just once, and found myself having a drink with a guy who yelled everything at me (mind you, not to me, AT me) and who walked his cat on a leash and found dogs irritating.  Needless to say I terminated my one month account with match.com that night.  One night a year later, when I was 27, I thought I would see what eharmony.com was all about.

I found that I was going to have to answer a lot of questions, so I opened up a bottle of pinot grigio and got answering.  Well, I finished the bottle of wine before I finished the questions.  So in typical fashion, I closed my computer and left finding love up to chance.  Fast forward about 8 months on another night and I wondered if those questions I started to answer 8 months before were saved.  I signed in and found I had finished 60% of the Q&A.  I figured since I didn't remember the first 60% of the questions, I should pop open another bottle of wine to finish the last 40% and not remember those.  Not the wiser of choices.

Here's where my relationship with eharmony started to become rocky.  I joined with a 3 month membership (you know, join for multiple months and save multiple 3's of dollars) and I started getting set up left and right.  After I met a boy I got into a relationship with, I cancelled eharmony, it had done its job.  Well, after a 3 month summer romance with this guy, we broke up over the phone.  I decided not only was he dead to me but so was eharmony.  Clearly blame had to be placed, so it was totally the fault of eharmony.

After I'd turned 29 and 30 and been on some unsuccessful set-up dates and had stayed away from eharmony, I decided to give the old "frienemy"another shot.  I logged in and paid for another three months (hey, no reason to throw away money) and went in with an open mind.  After three months of many not fun, but funny dates, I decided to end my membership.  However, when I started to end it I kept getting "matched up" with someone who was intriguing, and so I keep finding myself getting sucked back in.  This relationship is unhealthy, I know.

The issue with answering a billion questions over multiple bottles of wine and over multiple months and never having the option to answer or see those questions again is you risk your match settings with no option for change.  So my choice in men has either drastically changed from when I was 27 until now, which could be true, or my answers were plucked in by a chicken at random.  For some reason I keep getting set up with multiple youth ministers, accountants, fathers (in the literal sense) and tattooed bikers.  What may I ask can one person answer in any one of those questions that can get you a gamut of set ups like this?  Well, get ready, because my next eharmony date is monday!  (sneak peak, he's an auditor/missionary and finds material objects to be subjects evil)...